Moods and Business Development: Some thoughts for Professionals

Business Development
Written By Jules Lye

Photo by Jeremy Bishop 

Mike*, a consultant under pressure to secure new business for his team, found himself in a swirl of moods. His bosses’ frustration left him anxious and resigned, doubting his ability to succeed: What’s the point? It won’t work anyway. He was right. His efforts weren’t working as well as he’d hoped. Over time, Mike worked with a coach to help him articulate his firm’s value proposition and to prepare well for client conversations. But what made the biggest difference to Mike was becoming more aware of his moods and cultivating better ones for business development.

Cultivating constructive moods is essential for success in business development. While some seem naturally able to embody good moods, many find it challenging. And yet, there is little training or awareness to help us notice, let alone cultivate, the moods that serve us best. While there is growing awareness of moods that contribute to depression and anxiety, there is less understanding of how our everyday moods at work shape our experiences and influence how we show up to others, and what we can do about them.

The Quiet Power of Moods
Moods quietly but noticeably shape our professional and personal lives. Moods often arise from our opinions/perspectives and influence decisions, interactions, and actions in ways we may not fully grasp. Unlike emotions—temporary or fleeting responses to specific moments—moods linger. Moods can be likened to the unseen currents that steer the flow of a river, while emotions are the ripples left by a single stone. The challenge with our moods is that they are often invisible to us - but often not to others.

Our moods have the power to reveal what matters to us, and becoming more aware of our moods can be a source of wisdom and insight. Overdoing this though can send us down rabbit holes and result in unhelpful rumination. The skill is being able to distinguish between the two.

The Moods of Business Development
In business development, our moods—and those of others—are ever-present companions. A mood of resentment might lead us to approach business development conversations half-heartedly, whereas a mood of over-confidence may tempt us to believe no effort is required at all. Arrogance might have us not ask questions of a client or to talk down to them. Anxiety, hesitancy, or skepticism—whether in ourselves or others—can quietly erode the foundation of trust and possibility.

For Mike, the turning point was noticing how his mood of resignation had infiltrated his interactions with his clients. At other times, the pressure he was experiencing was being translated to becoming pushy with clients to get work quickly, which was turning clients off. By reconnecting with what mattered for him at work – and how he wanted to show up to clients and his team – he realised he had lost his focus on connecting with clients as people and helping them to solve their problems, and that he had taken his talented and committed team for granted. Mike decided to shift his mood and outlook. With the help of a coach, he developed more confidence (a conviction in his and his team’s ability to help clients) and curiosity (a genuine interest in learning about his clients’ needs) – deliberately and intentionally. He still felt worried and resigned at times, but he developed his skill for noticing these moods and finding ways to acknowledge these and reset when he needed to.

As Mike got better at working with his own moods, he also began to “read the room” with his clients, noticing moods they were in too. He recognised that some were eager to engage, while others were guarded, perhaps sceptical of his motives. Meeting scepticism with empathy, Mike acknowledged their concerns, even naming them: I understand that some consultants have made big promises and fallen short. My focus is to build trust and help, and you decide if you want to take it further. This awareness and honesty opened doors, transforming transactional moments into relationships built on trust.

Nurturing Moods That Serve Us and Others
In a world where anxiety and resentment seem increasingly pervasive, cultivating constructive moods is both a challenge and a necessity. Beyond the basics of exercise, rest, meditation and connection, here are four steps to intentionally improve your mood:

  1. Check the mood you are in, periodically (without becoming too focused on yourself): Pause and reflect and name your moods, because naming brings awareness and can reduce a mood’s hold on you. Eg. you might be feeling very confident about an upcoming pitch. If you can’t name it exactly just try and describe the feeling.

  2. Investigate the moods’ impact: While being confident is important in a pitch, being very confident can result in complacency. One way to check the appropriateness of a mood for a situation is to see what opinions or assumptions are behind the mood and check for their validity by looking for evidence. If a client said they are “looking forward to receiving a proposal”, that alone doesn’t justify being very confident.

  3. Choose what other moods or qualities would be important for the situation. In the example above, being more humble and curious might provide a greater connection and understanding of what’s important for the client and increase the chances of a successful pitch. In more general business development situations, consider how you want to and need to show up to your clients, and what qualities bring out your best. Your values and the values of your firm can be an important guide here, too. Set an intention to embody one or two of these qualities, all the while being responsive and skillful to what happens in the conversation. When you falter, reflect, reset, and return.

  4. Forget about yourself and start helping your clients. When you think about your clients concerns and help them, just doing this tends to put us in a better mood.

By attuning to our moods with curiosity and self-compassion, we can navigate the currents of business and life with greater grace, skill and connection, and be our best more often.

* Mike’s story is fictional but drawn on many real-life examples.

Additional Resources:

This a big topic of which I have barely scratched the surface. Below are some additional resources that you may find interesting and useful.

Jules Lye
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